I did forget. He did not. He brought me to the place I need to be. I could not have figured it out otherwise.
Remember when I talked about the Promised Land and how the Israelite people had to wander the desert for 4o years til they figured some things out. Like how to trust in God.
I guess I had to do something similar.
I have been reading in my past journals. I have been journaling almost regularly since about 1995. In my 1999 journal (I cannot even write that number without thinking of Prince’s song, “1999”!!! hehe…), I wrote how I felt like God was directing me to write for people to read. I read my response to that… UH No!! I don’t think so.. Who would want to read what I have to write??!!!
In my entry for 9 of 2000, I wrote: “I read from Habakkuk 1-3. God has something in mind. For us. Now. I believe He is leading me to prophesy and to writing. Make it plain has been ‘jumping out at me’ lately. In Habakkuk it says; Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so that a herald may run with it. In my notes at the bottom of the page it says “herald can also mean, so that whoever reads it”.
What can He want me to write plainly that hasn’t already been written? Also, I keep feeling like God is saying to me, “talk to the people”. I have never been a speaker. Anyone who knows me knows that. So whatever happens, we will ALL know it is God. “
I forgot I had written all that. But I did keep writing not knowing exactly what I was writing all of that down for. Now, here in 2014, I am blogging. Writing for people to read. I am not exactly sure of the purpose, or even if people will continue to read my blogs. I have had a good response so far. Maybe I will continue to have a good response. I don’t know. I just know that this is what I am supposed to do!
Also, I have had a few speaking opportunities. Yes, I am speaking to groups of people. I NEVER would have done that in 1999!!! God did it.
God has shown me He is indeed faithful. We just have to be obedient to His plans. We just have to trust that He will bring to pass what He has promised. Remember the Israelites? They eventually received the Promise. It didn’t look like they expected, nor did the first group get there. The old had to die away. Again, in my own life, the old had to die away. I could not have written and spoke from the place I was at.
I can now.
Because of God. I chose to allow Him into my life, to let Him into those areas of my life that needed healing, and allowed Him to heal those areas. I just knew I needed to. Back in the early days, it was just that I KNEW. Now, I know the HOW. I know how to lead others into healing. Even though I know that ultimately, they have to make the choice to allow Him in to heal them.
We always have a choice. I have been known myself to tell God, “No not there not now.” He is patient with me and leads me gently until I am able. He does that with His children. We do that with ours right??
I would not have had my boys, my younger boys, stain the entire house themselves. Not without help, supervision and training.
God is the same way. He is patient with us– He doesn’t get mad and stomp away.. Rather, He is up there watching us, waiting til we are ready. Laughing and smiling as we make mistake after mistake. Getting ready to finally say ok. “God its not working. Will You please fix this?” And He does. Not always right away. We have to learn how to live in the new areas first, so it happens slowly over time til suddenly, we look back and think, whoa. Wait a minute. I am in a totally new area!!
God is like that.
So, as I work out this new journey of writing and potentially speaking, I realize: “Whoa…. Wait a minute. I am in a totally new area!! But its one God spoke to me about years ago. Just as the Israelites knew about the Promised land, I knew about this possibility.
I just didn’t get it yet….
Keep going friends. Be encouraged. Its not under your strength these things happen. Its under your weakness. Allow Him in to help you in those areas.