I have been hearing/reading about people who actually get out of their house kids in tow. Then I am also hearing about those who leave their kids behind with a babysitter.
I wonder who is better off in the long run?
I actually feel kind of sad for the ones who leave their kids home with the babysitter. I mean, always not just on occasion. They can’t go to the grocery store with their kids, or to anywhere. I love it when I see moms or dads out with 3 or more kids. Mostly, when I see 3 because I remember how it was for me when we had our third child. 2, I could handle going anywhere with and I did. 3 however, challenged me for a time. I realized how outnumbered I was. I hesitated to go anywhere and even asked my sister to come with for the first few times. She wouldn’t.
I had to learn how to do it myself if I ever wanted to go anywhere again!! Hubby was working long hours and I couldn’t count on him to be home before I was too exhausted to go myself. So I bit the bullet and left with 3 little ones in tow. We survived! We arrived back home with the same 3 little ones! I was so proud of myself that I did it again and again!
Unfortunately, once or twice, I forgot to buckle the last one in their carseat in my rush to get them all in, the groceries all in, and back on the road. I had to pull over once when the babies carseat with the baby in it, fell off the carseat it had been put on. She has survived with only minor mental issues!!
Just kidding! She was and is fine!
Stuff happens sometimes. Its not the end of the world!!
Understandably, you do NEED some time off for your own sanity and going to the grocery store alone is, quite frankly, heavenly, when your in the midst of things. Sitting alone in a coffee shop or the like is really sweet during those days! I treasured those days!
But, how can you teach your kids how to behave in a restaurant or grocery store if you never take them? How do you form relationships with your kids when you don’t spend the time talking, walking, learning, growing with them?
I have lots of crazy stories about taking ALL my kids with me to the store. We traveled in a “pack”. People would look at us funny sometimes but that is ok too. Sometimes they would scream and cry. It happens. We move on.
A few times we temporarily lost someone. They were found- its ok. They learned to stay with me.
I love taking them for walks- at least until some of them started to consider them training sessions for cross country runs. That’s not any fun! I don’t run. I still had a few who would stroll with me. Until they got too tired and didn’t want to walk anymore. Yea.. there was one that didn’t work out quite as well as I wanted it to….
But they learn. I learn. That time I learned that a walk like that was not what we were ready to do. It was too much. So we went on other walks in other places that they could handle until we were all ready to take the longer hikes again. I let the older ones run it if they wanted to. Just wait for me at intervals, which was another thing I learned to remember to tell them.
We talk together. We look for groceries in the store together. I give them something to hunt for, they learn to read the labels on the cereal boxes. They can get any cereal they want as long as the sugar count is at least close to 10 or below. They learn how to pick out good vegetables and fruits. They love the farmer’s market. They are actually excited to find new vegetables or fruits to try out! They love getting those honey sticks! They talk to the vendors.
We look for sales at the stores when we need to buy clothes or shoes or birthday presents. I give them a dollar amount and they can find something in that dollar amount. We negotiate, we discuss, we settle on an appropriate purchase.
I learn about them. They learn about me.
Now that they are all older and gone all day in school, I have lost a bit of connection with them. I go almost everywhere alone. Its weird. Its taken me 15 or so years, but it has happened. Now, it probably won’t take you as long so don’t panic!
I have gotten used to going places on my own. I have gotten used to traveling in silence without even the radio on. This next 2 weeks on vacation is going to be a bit tough in that aspect. It will be good for us all to reconnect and learn about each other again.
It will be good for us all to again reconnect with the blessings God has given us and rejoice! Our children are a gift to us. Enjoy them, teach them, grow WITH them. It really does slip away too fast!!
Blessings on your beautiful day!!